Dr. Kretzing was 85 years old when he died. Of those 85 long years, I only had 2 1/2 years with possibly the most iconic Doctor in Carlisle. Most people would be disappointed, even angry that they were slighted. I am incredibly thankful for the 2 1/2 years, the 32 short months I had.
I knew who he was for many years, but only from the back. He was the big guy standing next to Mr. Burkholder on the field. Football games, soccer games….mostly soccer games. Mrs. Kretzing was at every soccer game. She was surrounded by a cloud of dust and activity that sometimes took the form of a little boy or two. I was never really sure how many younger brothers there were, they moved around a lot. Mrs. Kretzing took it all in stride. Always a bright smile on her face and a “What can I help you with?” attitude. My brothers played soccer with the older Kretzing boys and they spent a lot of time at our house, but I was just the kid sister. But all I knew of the family patriarch was the back of a forest green coat, jacket, or sweatshirt.
As a Carlisle High School Cheerleader, we spent a few years back to back. He was facing the field and I was facing the stands. We shared a love for Carlisle Sports.
When I finally did come face to face with Dr. Kretzing, it was in his living room. I was being “reintroduced” to him as George’s girlfriend. I was more than a little nervous. He was larger than life, it’s true, but he was also really, really tall! Here I was: 48 years old and instantly I was 12 again, and a nervous wreck. After all, I was separated, the mother of five kids, and seven years younger than his oldest son who apparently thought I was worth dating. He was quiet, a little stoic even. Of course, Mrs. Kretzing was full of chatter and immediately tried to feed me.
While George was living in NC he would fly up to see me a couple times a month and stay at his parent's house. Little by little, I got more comfortable sitting in the family living room now face to face after only seeing his back for most of my life. Inevitably, Mrs. Kretzing would need George’s help moving something or other and I would be alone with the Doctor. Most of the time, he would work on his Soduko puzzles or read the paper. The small talk was sparse, but he eventually began to tell me stories of his childhood, Perry County, college and med school. I knew I had touched his heart when he looked at me one day and smiled, “You know, my grandmother’s name was Mary.”
I began to stop by even when George was not up. He enjoyed the crab soup from Spoon’s and he was a fan of Beaman’s carrot cake….I made some big points when I delivered these. He liked to stand to greet me so I would always come in and rush to his chair before he stood up. We never spoke of it, but he would smile as he shifted his weight to lean back. His greeting eventually became leaning towards me with his cheek, waiting for his kiss and he always got it!
As I said before, I was still married when George and I started dating. Dr. and Mrs. Kretzing were understandably concerned about the situation. Once I explained that I needed to stay married for a little longer to keep my health insurance, he told me that was important. As they learned more about my situation, they embraced me and gave me nothing but support during an extremely difficult time in my life. Like I said, not much came out of his mouth in those early days, but he made it clear he approved.
He was always interested in my kids, the sports they played, and any medical conditions they may have. One time, I thought one of the girls had strep and he told me to bring her by so he could take a look. I’d always been taught not to ask Doctors medical questions, so I was hesitant. He could see that “This gives me an excuse to be a Dr again and pull out my bag.” So, I shouldn’t have been surprised when, after receiving a dog bite, there was a knock at the door. I limped my way to open the front door only to see Dr. and Mrs. Kretzing. He, holding his black bag and she with banana bread. A Doctor who still made house calls!
In the last phase of his life, he started forgetting words and had trouble keeping up with the conversation. Every once in a while he would throw in a zinger. Everyone would stop talking for a minute and he would look up with that smile on his face and a twinkle in his eyes. I loved that.
I was lucky enough to see him almost every day in the last month of his life. Shortly before he died, I kissed him goodbye and told him I loved him. He looked me in the eyes and said: “I love you too.” So, no, I don’t feel cheated that I missed his first 83 years, I feel blessed and incredibly thankful that I got to know him as more than the back on the field…I got to know him face to face.
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