You can take a kid away from the Army...

First I wanted to say thanks to everyone for all the kind words from yesterday's post. I really try not to be a Debbie Downer too often. Laughing is much more fun!

Sawyer had a much better day today! Even his teacher sent me an email saying as much. He was actually able to sit with me for a few minutes after he got home and talk about the papers in his back pack before demanding 5 chicken nuggets. It has to be five now that he is 5 years old. The condiment choice of the day was ketchup because he saw a red truck while he was on the School Bus today. He explained to me that if he saw a yellow truck it would be mustard. BUT if he saw a yellow race car he would need mustard and ketchup.

Have you read "The Curious Case of the Dog in the Nightime?" (I know it's supposed to be underlined, but I can't find the button at the moment) Anyway, it's a book about a teenager with Asperger's and is written from his point of view. In the beginning he explains how he determines if he's gonna have a good day. It has something to do with the colors and types of cars he sees on the way to school. Like if he sees a yellow car, it's going to be an awful day.

Are you catching the parallel here? Creepy! So either Sawyer had a totally "typical" 5 year old moment of rambling on about some random reason to pick ketchup over mustard, or he's really demonstrating some characteristics of autism (making up "rules" for himself and needing to follow them to the letter), OR his intelligence surpasses anything we could conceive and he's been to the library, read the book and is demonstrating a more warped and twisted sense of humor than his mother! I have always said the boy is the original Stewie Griffen.

He had this uncanny knack of acting completely "typical" whenever something has caused Charlie and I to be concerned. It's almost like he knows we are watching him more closely so he throws his "normal development" switch. He'll do something beyond what we would have expected of him and we think "Oh, okay, he is doing well." Then the second we turn our back he'll start flapping his hands or rolling his eyes into the back of his head. Can you not see Stewie practicing all this in the mirror of his room? Then he'll throw back his head and laugh while he goes back to working on his plan to kill Lois and take over the world.

However, this post is about what happened AFTER the chicken nugget discussion. I was doing laundry and Sawyer walked in.

S: Call Daddy! (Odd, he hates talking on the phone)

M: We can't babe, he's working.

S: Call Daddy! Call Daddy! Call Daddy!

M: Sauce, he's at work. The best we can do is leave a message.

S: Call him!

M: If we get the machine will you leave him a message? (Of course he's gonna say no)

S: Yes!

M: (This is getting interesting) What will you tell him?

S: Come home!

M: Sweetie, he can't come home. He's working.

S: Him could have a break.

M: Remember he had to get on an airplane to get where he's going? It's far away.

S: A airplane could bring him home and take him back. Just quick.

M: Honey, it's too far to come home, even for the weekend. Do you want me to show you the calendar and when he'll come home.

S: Call Daddy!

M: Okay. Here I'll put it on speaker so you can hear the message and then talk into the phone.

So amazingly, at 1pm (2pm Eastern) Charlie answers the phone. I thought for sure it wouldn't even be turned on. Anyway, it ends like this:

C: Hey honey, can I call you right back?

M: Yes, nothing's wrong. (I hang up)

Sawyer looks at me quizzically.

M: Daddy's gonna call us right back.

S: Why?

M: He's busy.

S: (Light bulb goes off above his head and his eyes widen) Him's in a battle right now?


Awwwww, how sad is that? All some of these military kids know is that when they put their Daddy's (or Mommy's) on an airplane they must be going to war. I tried to tell him, no, he's near Nana and BobBob, in Virginia. But I'm pretty sure all that did was make him think that next summer when we go home, we'll be really close to the "battles."

All summer he played "Army Man." He would ride on the bouncy horse my Dad put out on the deck. You know the one w/ the 4 springs that squeaks unmercifully as it goes up and down or back and forth? Anyway, he be up there bouncing away and he'd yell "Bye Mom!"

M: Where're ya going?

S: Iraq. You need to come too, but your to big for my horse. You can ride a bicycle.

M: Thanks!

S: It's gonna take 3 days. Get some guns, we have to leave now!



Like I said, you can take a kid away from the Army...