Took me long enough...

I've never been one to do anything in a timely manner. I'm late no matter what I do. Although, I usually have a very good excuse. Do you really want me to be on time for church if Sawyer and I are covered in his vomit? Yeah, I didn't think so. But that's a whole other post...when I get around to it.

Before Charlie deployed I fantasized about not having to cook dinner and having 1/7 less laundry to do. And let me tell ya, those were fantasies worthy of a column (or two) in the "forum!" It was very hard to see him go and I was more worried this deployment than I ever have been, BUT there's something to be said for "breakfast for dinner" and a few less loads of ACUs (Advanced Combat Uniforms)!

I couldn't wait for the days the kids would go to school and I could be my own boss and do whatever I wanted all day. I wouldn't have to make the bed if I didn't want to, I wouldn't have to be available for lunch if Charlie came home, I'd have complete control of the remote 24/7. I was really looking forward to putting the kids in bed and having the evening to myself. Somehow, it didn't work out that way.

The kids were a mess w/ him gone and any thoughts of getting my own stuff done went down the sink drain while I did the millions of dishes the kids piled up each day. The ONE household chore Charlie has done consistently, no questions asked, since the day we got married, is the dishes. I know, I know, that's amazing blah, blah, blah, but I will have more to say about that someday when I get the time...

The point is, that I had one less person in the house and I thought it would give me more time. However, just the fact of him being gone for the reason he was gone, caused more time consuming problems than anticipated.

I was having to spend more time at the kids schools b/c they were falling apart. Without throwing my kids under the bus by name and thus giving someone out in internet land some specific ammunition regarding my offspring, I'll just say that they needed support. When my support was not enough and school support couldn't deal with the problem, I began looking for extra support. This came in the way of therapy for one child, then two, and eventually I figured what the hell, I may as well get some time on the couch too.

Counseling was a good decision on many levels. And I'm sure it was one of the reasons we all survived the deployment. However, along w/ the guidance for raising children who can survive in today's world, therapy comes with a major downfall. IT EATS UP TIME!!!!

You're probably thinking, one or two appts a week, "What's the big deal?" The big deal is this: Child A has an appt at noon on Monday. This means I have from about 9:30 (when I detangle Sawyer from my leg at preschool) til 11:30 to get to gym, work out for an hour, get home, shower and head to school to pick up Child A for said appointment. The appt gets out around 12:45. We then go to McDonald's or Wendy's (I prefer Wendy's) drive thru b/c Child A has now missed lunch. (I prefer they miss lunch over math or other subjects I never absorbed) Now we are getting back to school around 1:15. We only get back sooner if the drive thru girl is not hungover and remembers to put the straw in the bag the first time we circle the restaurant. So, we arrive at school and I am required to walk Child A into school to sign them back in. (Why schools don't have a drive thru entrance I'll never know) After signing Child A in, I look at their face to gage my ability to exit. More times than not, I get the pleading eyes that say "PLEASE walk me to my classroom b/c I can't face having everyone look at me when I walk into a room w/ a group of my peers where I already feel like I don't fit in."

I walk them to the classroom. I can't help it. I know that soon enough they'd rather stick pins in their eyeballs than have me walk them to class. So I do. On the way, because I have 3 other children in the school, we invariably pass one of the other kids' classrooms or one of the specials classrooms(library, science, etc) where one of the siblings is. I can usually make eye contact and trade a thumbs up or a wave with Child B, C, or D. And maybe even 2 of the 3. But now the stakes have been raised. Whoa to the parent who touches base with only a portion of their spawns on a quick trip through the school hallways! All it takes is a discussion between sibs on the walk home from the bus stop to ruin the afternoon.

Child B: Why was Mom at school today?

Child D: Mom was at school today?

Child A: I had a Dr. Appt.

Child D: Mom was at school...today?

Child B: Did she walk by the library when she was picking you up or dropping you off?

Child D: Mom was there today...at our school?

Child A: That was when she was dropping me off.

Child D: She was inside the school?

Child C: Did she take you to lunch?

Child D: OUR MOM?!?!

Child A: Yeah, McDonald's.

Child D: McDonald's?!? (note the change of topic)

Child C: That's not fair!

Child D: McDonald's?!?

Child B: Whatever! She takes you to lunch all the time too. I never get to go to the Dr and get lunch!

At this point they have reached the front door. Child D is ALWAYS first onto the porch and refuses to open the door for himself. He insists on ringing the door bell even when the door is unlocked and ajar. I get to the door ready for hugs and kisses and "how was your day" and I am met w/ a backpack to the gut and a coat on my feet as Child D proclaims: "You never come to see me when you're at school and now I want McDonald's too!"

Welcome Home!


Back to my original point, before I so rudely interrupted myself. If I can get in and out of the school in less than 15 minutes - rare - I have a whopping 30 minutes before I have to pick up Sawyer from school. This is enough time to drive home, pee in the downstairs potty (as I won't have the time to go to the upstairs one), and drive over to the CDC to pick up Sawyer. My day as I know it is now over! On days I feel energetic I may try to run to the commissary after picking up Sawyer, but after a few times of bringing home a carload of chicken nuggets, meatballs and yogurt, I've learned that's not always such a good idea.

There you have it. One more day of my life lost into the vortex of time and space. I'm sure that still seems like no big deal. Now, do that twice during the school week and then add a regular medical appt in there somewhere b/c someone is always sick. Plus, figure on a few after school appts for Sawyer during the week.

By the time the kids are home from school, it's time for basketball, Girl Scouts, play dates and homework. Then dinner. Even if it is scrambled eggs, dishes get dirty. I can assure you we used several trees worth of paper plates while he was gone. But still, there were dishes to do and tables to wipe and tubs to give and by the time the I shoveled the last child into their bed and read a few pages of whatever it was we were reading, I was done. Many were the nights that I fell asleep reading to the kids and woke around midnight to shuffle off to my own bed. If I did manage to stay awake through 2 riveting chapters of the Magic Tree House, it was pretty much all I could do to change into pjs and crawl to my own bed.

I had rearranged our Netfliks cue after Charlie left b/c I was gonna watch all the movies I knew he wasn't interested in while he was gone. I don't like to admit this in public, but I've never even seen a scene of Sex in the City. I was gonna watch the series since I had 6 months to do it. In the six months he was gone, I think I watched 2 movies. I was just too tired. I did read more though...oh SNAP!!!

I just remembered that the reason I started writing this last night, was because I wanted to review a book. I felt guilty (as any good Catholic would) about the fact that I haven't been blogging at all.

It got me thinking about how much I didn't get done while Charlie was gone and how, now that he's back...I still can't get anything done. But that a whole other post...when I have a chance...

So, here's to the New Year, and to trying to find a few minutes everyday to write!